My last meal would definitely involve bacon in some form.

Dear Meredith:

Ten well-known chefs (including Mario Batali, Emeril Lagasse, and Nancy Silverton) were asked eight questions about food, including what their last meals would be and what their favorite kitchen gadgets are. One of my favorite answers has to be from Mario Batali. When asked what his last meal would be, he responded, "It would be a very long one: 753 courses consumed over 15 years, each with a different wine." That is certainly one way to extend life!

Eight questions with...

Stay away from my chimney

Dear Jennifer,

I'm sure we've discussed the hilarious existence of "Hunky Santa" at the Beverly Center. But there is something far more important to dish about. And that is this awesome website that collects the scariest Santas on celluloid and junk drive. Check it out.

SKETCHY SANTAS

Crazy wine guy

Dear Jennifer,

I refuse to buy any wine without seeing this man defile it online first. This wine critic is either drunk when doing his reviews, or has absolutely no sense of shame. Wine never sounded better than when this man tells you the nose of one of the glasses "kicks you in the face." It is entertaining to watch him try to come up with 'quirks' for his online vid persona. My favorite is when he throws a bunch of corks at the camera and exclaims "Sometimes I love to throw corks!"

WINE LIBRARY TV

I love receiving mail.

Dear Meredith:

This is an awesome idea, if just a wee bit creepy. (While I do love receiving mail, i don't like receiving mail from people I don't know.) Lenka Clayton and Michael Crowe took it upon themselves to send a handwritten letter to everyone first in a village in Ireland, than in a neighborhood of Pittsburgh, PA. If you follow the link, you can see all the mail they sent.

Mysterious letters

These pets are not LOL-ing.

Dear Jennifer,

We love to laugh at the adorable pictures of animals on the web, but what if the animals are not laughing along with us? This website shows the inner turmoil of pets who have been forced into cute photos. Is it sick that it's even funnier when the pets are clearly unhappy?

PETS WHO WANT TO KILL THEMSELVES

I do like the Swedish meatballs too.

Dear Meredith:

I have to say, I do like Ikea, even though I am sick to death of those damn allen wrenches. In this nifty video, watch a Lack table get made.

Such style!

Dear Meredith:

There are way too many "blogs" based on reader-submitted pictures, but I have to say, I sort of enjoy this one.

My Parents Were Awesome

Meep meep!

Dear Meredith:

Okay, I thought that the Muppets doing "Bohemian Rhapsody" was pretty awesome, but it might be out-awesomed by Beaker performing "Ode to Joy."

The unfortunate thing is that this song gets terribly stuck in your head.

Dear Meredith:

The Muppets do "Bohemian Rhapsody". Words can't do it justice.

There isn't possibly enough time for all this procrastination, is there?

Dear Meredith:

Of course, our site isn't the only one that can help you procrastinate. Check out this list of other internet vices, and their quite humorous descriptions.

Internet vices

Inglourious Basterds indeed.

Dear Meredith:

This is nothing less than awesome. Watch Brad Pitt and Quentin Tarantino on a Japanese cooking show. Need anything more be said?

(From SeriousEats.)

Part 2


Part 3

Pretty pretty letters.

Dear Meredith:

I'm a sucker for creative lettering - if I can't actually produce it, at least I can admire it, right?

Friends of Type

PANCAKES!

Dear Jennifer,

For some reason, I can only stomach waffles. But this collection of pancake photos is almost enough to make me a believer.

PANCAKES!
(found through Jezebel)

Watch Neo go!

Dear Meredith:

I mean, sometimes some people have just too much time on their hands - but then again, without them, who would recreate the bullet time dodge scene from The Matrix?

Does fine dining exist at Costco?

Dear Meredith:

I have a mad mad crush on Eric Ripert, the chef and co-owner of Le Bernardin in New York. Yes, I've featured him on this site before. But now he's on the small screen, with a cooking show, featuring Eric Ripert being inspired by nature and then cooking a dish based on this inspiration. In the link below, however, Alan Richman of GQ takes Eric Ripert to Costco (ie, NOT nature) to see his reaction.

Some choice quotations:

I am freaked out. Costco depresses me. I know everybody doesn’t have the same opportunities I do to visit farm stands and little markets, but I will fight to the end for inspirational shopping. Costco doesn’t even look like it belongs on our planet. It could be on the moon.

Alan asks me to push the cart, and I will not. Yes, I know I am being a spoiled brat, but for me it is an acceptance of the system. I do not want to be seen as somebody who supports this kind of store and this kind of system.

I just don't push shopping carts because I am lazy.

Avec Alan

Bart-crastination

Dear Jennifer,

I don't recall if you are a SIMPSONS fan or not, but every episode always had a very entertaining bit with Bart writing a reference to something terrible he did on a chalkboard at school for punishment. Someone compiled the list!

(from Jezebel's post)

BART'S CHALKBOARD

It's quickly approaching...

Dear Meredith:

As this year starts to wind down, this means that... dum dum dum... next year is the year we turn (GASP!!!) 30. Here's what you can expect as you enter your 3rd decade - thankfully, I finished school. Just in time! But I'm not too sure about this installing storm windows bit..

What to expect: The third decade

Practice makes pretty.

Dear Meredith:

Is all this time typing on computers affecting your handwriting? Here are some handy pointers on how to make the hand-printed word more legible - just in time for all your holiday cards!

The Write Stuff

For your health!

Dear Jennifer,

I know how much you like morbid online tests. This one is fantastic. You answer behavioral (and a few medical) questions and the "Life Calculator" will tell you how long you'll live.

TAKE THE CALCULATOR

Enjoy.

It's time to get away.

Dear Meredith:

Sometimes, I just want a weekend trip, but I don't know where to go or what to do - that's nearby, that is. Voila this handy website - choose where you live, how far you're willing to travel, and what kind of trip you want, and you'll get some recommendations. Unfortunately, it's currently only useful for those who live in big cities (aka, NOT ME), but here's hope that they add more cities soon.

Weekend Getaways

See the world from a different perspective

Dear Meredith:

This handy website converts pictures you've taken so that they look like photographs of miniature scale models. It's sort of awesome. The picture on top is one I took when in Porto, Portugal over the summer - and the one on the bottom is the tilt-shifted version.

Tilt Shift Maker

I really like the solution of only allowing orphans to enroll.

Dear Meredith:

Oh, this made me laugh so hard. So far, I'm not finding it true, as my students seem to prefer to just not show up whenever assignments are due. Seriously.

The Dead Grandmother/Exam Syndrome and the Potential Downfall Of American Society

Work up a sweat!

Dear Meredith:
It's so easy being sedentary, especially given that we largely have desk jobs. So I try to look for workout inspiration where I can. iTrain has a whole bunch of downloadable mp3s and podcasts by celebrity trainers. You can even train "with" Olympic gold medal winner Natalie Coughlin. While the majority of them are for a fee, there are some free ones online you can check out.

iTrain

Sparkly procrastination

Dear Meredith:
Sorry for the prolonged absence! This being-a-professor thing is stupid. In addition to teaching, I'm still expected to write papers? What? I don't understand how I'm supposed to have time for all of this, especially when I spend an inordinate amount of time playing the below-linked game. I think it's the gems. You know how anything related to jewelry transfixes me, even if it's fake.

Shields of Gemland

If the internet went down...

Cracked.com has a hilarious collection of photos for a recent contest they did asking for images to show what the world would be like if the Internet suddenly went away.

The number one winner is awesome.

THE WORLD OF TOMORROW

Wanna see my movie?

If you're in Los Angeles, and you like to see horror/thriller/sci-fi/fantasy shorts - then please come see my film VOID! Tickets are now on sale for the festival premiere of the film at Screamfest LA.

Here's the link for TICKETS

And here's the trailer!

Chicken and the Egg Rap Battle

A friend of mine is in a very hilarious show called "Lost Moon Radio" that has new material every three months, and plays on the second floor of an awesome little bar. One of the best sketches on the show was the Chicken v. Egg rap battle (in the style of "8 Mile")

For your listening pleasure, here is the sound file. It is awesome. (R rated, fyi)

Too delicious for its own good

JENNIFER! CHECK OUT THIS SITE! BACON AS A BUSINESS CARD! Actually, it's more like jerky, but, hey, I'll take it. Thanks to Tom for the find.

MEAT BUSINESS CARDS

Are you a top 25 douche?

GQ has done all the research to tell us the top 25 douchiest colleges in America.

I don't know if the fact that my school is number 11 is good, bad, or just plain douchey.
(Thanks to Patrick for the find)

TOP 25 DOUCHEY SCHOOLS

Now in 3-D!

Dear Jennifer,

I hope you are enjoying Delaware immensely. Since there is little else to do there right now besides prepare for the big pumpkin toss (better start your pushups), I thought you might enjoy this.

The Atrox is a webcomic from a few friends of mine, and they have just recently begun crafting little figures and taking pictures rather than draw the comic. So now Atrox is in 3-D! It's a brave new world.

Since I know you are as much a fan of adorable violence as I am, I suggest you read the whole history (even the drawn stuff).

THE ATROX

Jim Henson continues to save the world

Not only did he raise us, he's also bringing peace in the Middle East. This is a CNN article about new Sesame Street shows that are trying to teach children nonviolence, tolerance, and friendship. Get 'em when they're young, I say!

REACHING THE NEXT GENERATION

Why didn't I know about this before?

Apparently, the TMNT movies were so popular (no surprise there!) that Barbara Walters did an interview with the Turtles when the second film came out. Pretty much makes my childhood complete.

Everyone loves a sequel

The first book, "Pride and Prejudice and Zombies" is a national treasure.

Urban Legend spoilers!

Dear Jennifer,

My friend Matt sent me this link to a hilarious page that has simple solutions for top ranking mysteries. A guaranteed time suck.

6 Famous Unsolved Mysteries

I think I miss the cat

Dear Jennifer,

There is a website devoted to repurposing Garfield comic strips without Garfield in them. It's a bizarre combination of funny and...well...psychotic.

I always knew there was something wrong with Jon.

Garfield Minus Garfield

If FML is too hard core for you...

Then MLIA (My Life is Average) ought to be a little more your speed. This is a take on the FML website, except it praises the mundane rather than the unfortunate.

MY LIFE IS AVERAGE

Another good one: Yoga = aerobics + 10 years - headbands.

Dear Meredith:

Along the lines of indexed, here's a website that cleverly uses simple math equations to illustrate non-math concepts.

New Math

Hospital food = airline food without all the plastic wrap?

Dear Meredith:

Hungry? You might not be, after looking at this compilation of hospital food from around the world.

Hospital food

Franken-bears.

Dear Meredith:

In case you're feeling a bit bored at the office today, and you have some gummi bears, check out this website. I have to say, I never got more complex than switching heads.


Gummy Bear Surgery

Dear Meredith:

You know how I feel about hipsters. Now, there's a whole SITE devoted to making fun of them. My life is complete. (Almost.)

Look at this fucking hipster

And that's what squashing a goombah looks like.

Dear Meredith:

I know how you love video games. You'll just love this flickr gallery depicting video game deaths.

8-Bit Fatalities