
It's almost going to be sad when the current President leaves office, because he is such good fodder for comedy. Then again, I'd probably rather have a President who does good things for the economy.


"Repeat offenders get a note on their file that says "LUBE WARNING". Management policy is that for $6.50 an hour, clerks should not have to deal with the bodily fluids of others. The first time we discreetly but firmly remind the customer that the tapes need to come back clean. The second time we hand him the tape, the Windex, and the paper towels and tell him to clean off the tape in full view of whoever else is at the counter."
"I am sorry. Not for eating you, for your meat was like butter and nuts and had a richness that didn’t seem like it should belong to the sea."